can only describe our saturday night. My ben has asthma. when he was little we dealt with croup. croup cough so bad that his breathing was stridor. scary stuff.
i had to do the homework myself...thank goodness for the internet & mom message boards. it felt good to take ben into the children's clinic here in mccomb for the last time to inform the dr. (we had seen no less that 4 times regarding all this) of ben's condition & let doc know she failed him miserably with her passive inert attitude.
anyway, you've got the background. with the help of dr. watson at stat care and dr. austin at the ent clinic, we took a more proactive approach to treat the condition in an effort to ward off the episodes. daily singular & zyrtec, removal of carpet in ben's room plus a cool mist humidifier & ionic breeze & said episodes stay at bay. i was just thinking a week or so ago...my...it's been a good long while since ben has had any problems with his asthma.
fast forward...friday morning. is that ben i hear getting up. 'bark, bark'...yep & he's croupy. exhale (note to self: don't remark on how well he is doing in the future; knocking on wood doesn't help.) breakfast...no more croupy :o)
saturday. croupy. croupy enough that I break out the liquid albuterol. he gets a last dose just before bedtime to be safe.
sunday morning 4am... I'm awaken from my deep sleep. my ben is crying...loudly. (he NEVER does this...never wakes during the night...& never awakes crying) I'm grogy, but hurry towards his room. he meets me. he's hysterical. he's gasping. gasping hard between hard-fought-for breaths amist crying, coughing, and the words: momma i can't breath
i'm scared. he's bad. i pick him up. he's scalding hot. hot to the touch. there is such fear in his little teared up eyes. i know he needs medicine. fast. i hear:
i can't breath momma i'm gonna die.
did i mention i'm scared?
he's too frantic to take it. i turn off the alarm & take him outside. it's cold...maybe the cold will calm him. cool him. help open the swelling inside. the whole time i'm calm. cool. reassuring. i hold him tight to me and talk in a whisper, like when he was little. 'breath with me, baby. let's breath together.' he tried really hard. he cooperated. he calmed himself so he could focus of breating.
he gets calm enough for his inhaler and does the best job ever of coordinating with that puff. my little guy knew he needed that medicine.
a generous dose of motrin...concerned about that fever. i remember the little dose of liquid steriod i tucked away-left over from the last episode. the little dose i had rescued from the 'fridge during katrina. the little dose who's label had peeled off in the ice chest during said rescue attempt. but i knew what it was and i was greatful i had it.
he's still strugling we take him in & sit him up in our bed with cartoons while i get dressed for a trip to the er. ben hears us talking about it & freaks. okay...we can't afford him to wig out. we agree to give him 15 minutes to improve. he does. short labored breaths, but breaths still the same.
he's cooled off some, but still warm. a spongebob thermometer check reads 103.2...yikes...i can only imagine what it was 40 minutes ago.
we sleep- chuck & I lightly- with ben in the middle, listening to him breath.
Sunday morning...we keep with the plans to go to church. ben's tired, but doing well. he brings along the chuch hushpuppy-dog backpack (thanks aunt dedee!) filled with the usual paper, pens, and hotwheels.
morning announcements aren't even over, when ben taps my shoulder and shows me this: (what he said is written to the side.)
isn't he amazing!?!
so, we've discussed the events & how if it happens again we will go to the er, and he has to be calm about that. he really is a smart little dude...i pray it doesn't get out of hand like that again, but i know i can count on him to be big about it. (plus i promised there would be NO shots involved.)
I had a 'sleeve' prescribed to him for his inhaler this morning-it's hard to coordinate that puff with a 5 year old, but the sleeve makes all the difference! some more liquid steroid for this bout (as well as a backup i can use to keep this from happening like this again.) and some meds for me as well because ben has never had a bad episode of this when I wasn't dealing with my usual throat problems.
i'll wrap this novel up, knowing that only my mom may have made it this far ;o), asking for prayers for ben and his 'closed up' lungs. we would both be grateful!
night friends.
![](http://<a href="http://www.cafepress.com/lindey"><img src="http://www.cafepress.com/content/banners/promo_120x60_01.gif" width="120" height="60" alt="Support This Site" border="0"></a>){kind=link}